By JOHN JAMES MARSHALL/Designated Writers

Hey NBA, do you think you are overdoing it just a bit? Did I miss the memo that Adam Silver has been replaced as commissioner by Dr. Anthony Fauci?

Because it sure looks like Dr. Fauci, who has said that even in a Covid-free world he would recommend no one ever shake hands again, has come up with the guidelines for the NBA’s return. And by the way, they might actually find a vaccine by the time the NBA starts up again; we are still more than six weeks away.

The NBA world is going to live in “the bubble” in Orlando when its season resumes, but being in an actual bubble is probably more appealing considering some the lengths the NBA has gone to in trying to make sure everyone knows they have every intention of leaving no disease-ridden stone unturned.

The list is ridiculously long, so let’s just hit the lowlights highlights.

** You can play golf, but you can’t have a caddy. Do you really think they are going to be walking 18 holes in July in the Florida heat?

** If the players are in a card game, a new deck must be used after each game. Who likes shuffling anyway?

** Players can wear a “proximity alarm” that will notify the wearer if he or she spends more than five seconds within six feet of another person. All team and league staff will be required to wear these. Might come in handy on the 18th green with a few grand on the line; you could just go stand 5 feet away as your opponent is about to try to make that birdie putt.

** Everyone will be required to wear a facemask, except when eating, at a workout or practice, in their room, or if they are swimming or doing something more than six feet away from another person. You mean you don’t have to wear the mask while eating? Sweet!

** Benches at the games will have two rows, just like at a regular NBA game. The players and coaches on the front bench do not have to wear masks (although it is encouraged for coaches), but coaches and trainers on the second row of the bench must wear masks. That’s going to make it much harder for a coach to get a technical foul, so that may not be a bad thing. Then again, you’ll be able to hear every squeak of a sneaker since there is no crowd noise to drown anything out.

And my favorite …

** Ping pong is allowed. But you can’t play doubles ping pong. Seriously.