I’m not sure if I’m getting dumber or just now realizing just how dumb I have been and nobody has bother to tell me. I’ve got three examples; curiously, two of them involve gasoline.

EXAMPLE #1: About three months ago, I suddenly realized I’ve stared at something for a long time and never, ever, had the light bulb go off. You how when you look at your dashboard and there is the little gas pump icon? Have you noticed the little arrow/triangle that is beside the icon? Of course you have. And of course, you know that it indicates on which side of the vehicle the gas tank is located. I had no idea. I don’t know what I thought it was beyond that it must have been some kind of decoration. And I have driven in vehicles in which the has tank has been on either side. Never had a clue. Duh.

EXAMPLE #2: I went to buy a gas can the other day and thought the only complication might be what size  can to get. Until I got there. I soon discovered the ugly truth: Gas can technology had evolved exponentially since the last time I bought one (late ’90s?). I’ll skip to the bottom line — I walked out without buying one BECAUSE I HAVE NO IDEA HOW TO USE IT! I know where the gas goes and that’s about it. I don’t know what’s going on with this complicated spout business and how it’s supposed to work once the gas is in the tank.

EXAMPLE #3: This will be simple example of my stupidity. If the only differentiation between the salt shaker and the pepper shaker is the number of holes at the top, it’s 50-50 whether I’ll get it right. Two nights ago, I poured pepper in the boiling water to season my spaghetti noodles. One had three dots and the other had five dots. How was I supposed to know? Y’all learned that and didn’t tell me?