By JOHN JAMES MARSHALL/Designated Writers

I try to stay as far away from college football conspiracy as possible because they are almost all driven by fans with overactive imaginations. I particularly try to stay away from SEC conspiracy theories because they almost always center around Alabama. But there’s something about the start time of the Utah State-LSU game that really smells.

Let’s see, Alabama’s Nick Saban complains about how his team plays too many games in the afternoon because it’s hot in Tuscaloosa. So the SEC does something about it … and gives LSU two games in three weeks not just in the afternoon, but at 11 a.m. in the morning.

Last week, it was Vanderbilt and in two weeks, it’ll be another dew sweeper against Utah State. (The Tigers have this week off.)  LSU oughta be thankful that there isn’t a 9 a.m. time slot.

(Mind you, this is particularly galling to me because I now have 50-yard line tickets that I can no longer use.)

To make matters worse, do you know what game is being played at night on October 5 on the SEC Network? That would be Vanderbilt and Ole Miss. That’s winless Vanderbilt against not-very-good Ole Miss. I’ll bring the chips and salsa!

So The Grove is such sacred ground that the people in Oxford can’t get their Topsiders wet in the morning grass? Tough it out, Tripp/Hunter/Niles or whatever your name is.

They could have also put LSU-Utah State in the 3 p.m. slot, but apparently it was reserved for that great intersectional rivalry that is Troy and Missouri. Either one of those in the Top 5?

I understand the conference dynamic. Every team, no matter what the status, should have to take an 11 a.m. hickey every once in a while. But consecutive games for LSU? There should be some right of refusal if you are in the Top 10. Once is plenty, especially for a program like LSU where night games are traditional.

At least Alabama won’t have to worry about it being too hot. The Crimson Tide isn’t playing that day.