ORANGE BEACH, Ala. — When I got the call that our beach condo was going to be available at noon, we had to make a decision. Veteran Gulf Coast visitors know that typically, accommodations are available after 3 p.m. on the day of arrival.

But noon? That would give us basically almost an extra day. With one problem — we’d have to leave at 4 a.m. for the 8-hour drive.

That meant waking up at 3:30.

That meant going to bed at 10 p.m. the night before.

So I did whatever was necessary to be as tired as possible. I ran three miles. I mowed the lawn. I played 27 holes. Plus last-minute packing.

I am one of the world’s greatest sleepers. On any other night, five minutes tops and I’m out. So I climbed in the sack at 10:15 and was ready to get my less-than-recommended five hours of sleep.

And then it was 11 p.m. Nothing.

And then it was midnight. My eyes looked like Marty Feldman (do the research if you missed that reference).

Now I’m just mad, and who sleeps well when they are mad? The more I tried, the more awake I became.

I last looked at the clock at 12:20 before the sandman took over. By then, it really didn’t matter. Woke up and was out of the driveway at 4:07.

I am one of those guys who always insists on driving, so there was no alternative. I saw no joy in the sun rising over Alexandria. After a couple of head bobbles before reaching the halfway point of Baton Rouge, it was clear sailing after that.

But I spend all of the effort to get in an extra half-day at the beach and exactly what for? I arrived, looked out over the balcony, emptied the vehicle of its contents and then … took a nap.

I will say, it was one of the great naps of the 21st century, but it would have been nicer to have had that on the front end of the cycle rather than the back end.

It’s an axiom that still remains true: The more you are worried about the oversleeping, the tougher it is to go to sleep. At least I have seven days to catch up on my sleep.